I haven’t written in forever! I’ve just been so busy with school and stuff. But I’m back.
For the past couple weekends I took a graduate course in Principles and Practices of Expressive Arts Therapy. It was packed full of information and interesting things, which I’ll be sure to post about.
I’d like to post here one of my artistic representations. Our assignment was to use one modality of the arts to describe our relationship to another, so for example, doing a song about writing, or an art piece about dance. Everyone’s was really amazing!
I did a poem about singing. Here it is:
Singing and Me
Standing frozen still by the piano,
In the studio,
And then onstage.
Working each song to a complete polish.
Making sure each note is in tune,
Every rhythm accurate.
The character’s story is maped out in my head,
I put my face in the right expressions,
My voice holds the right tone.
I am miles away,
Lost in an artificial world,
Not having to touch any of my own feelings.
Concentrate on hitting that high note,
Coming in right on that entrance.
Practice, Practice, over and over again.
Until the song is ready for performance.
Then go over this planned performance many times so it’s ready for recital.
This was how I sang for five years.
Standing in the open space of the studio,
No piano in sight.
Just my voice alone resonating against the walls.
Here, I sing songs and look for feelings, connect them to my life.
Here, too I make up my own songs.
Here, I am told:
“be you when you sing for me, don’t be a character.”
I am asked how I feel a million times,
And sometimes lately I’m struck by the fact that often I don’t know.
For so long I haven’t wanted to know.
For so long I sang to escape my feelings.
I am starting to see that when I feel truly connected to a song,
My singing is better than any rigid training instructions from a voice teacher can make it.
I’m learning that it’s nice not to have to worry about phraising,
The “right note,” or the right rhythm. Often if something’s too low or high for me, it’s adjusted. I am starting to move while I sing, with surprising results. I am learning not to worry about how my body moves, and to just let it happen. I feel much more happy about singing now. Though sometimes it is scary.
I will not turn back to the voice studio with the piano any time soon. Ill stay as long as I can in the clear open space and quiet, with guidance from someone who knows how to help me use my voice to find out more about myself.
I figure that’ll spark your curiosity about both voice lessons and Voice Movement Therapy, what I refer to in the second part of my poem. I’ll be sure to write about both in great detail later.
That’s all everyone. Talk to you later.