Just wanted to write a quick update. I’ve been doing really the past couple weeks getting into a routine of doing crisis textline shifts every Friday night and other stuff on the computer the rest of the week.
Today is my two year anniversary of coming to Albany care and I couldn’t be happier. I guess life works out. Because Friedman Place is so full of drama now and this crazy executive director who’s bent on making the place look good. He literally had the dining room repainted first thing he got there, this is a place for the blind I’ll repeat. Recently he put carpeting in the elevator. I don’t know too many elavators with carpet especially in a place where people will spill all over it. It’s totally not about what the resident’s need anymore it’s just all him running the show. Apparently the really good staff that really advocated for residents before left due to having enough of it all. And whoever’s left is waiting to get fired I guess. I got a random e-mail from one of the social worker’s yesterday, the one that knew me well saying my phone interview was up for my application to FP. If you remember back in the summer I went through this weird two month phase of wanting to leave Albany. I reapplied even while my best friend from there Robbie knocked some sense into me about it. I was told my application wouldn’t come up for like three years so I didn’t really worry about it. So the guy’s like yeah we should set up a time for this phone interview. And I’m like no not happening, because you guys are so dense or unable to see the need or whatever I can probably never live there again. Because guess what I have chronic mental illness and I need ongoing services to do well where I live and that’s not gonna happen there. I told him they suck at providing services to people with multiple disabilities, which they do. They have a handful of people with developmental disabilities they don’t know what to do with never mind all the psych people. So I basically gave him an earful. Because they promised they had mental healthcare and had worked with mentally ill people. And that’s so not the case.
It made me so grateful to be living in IL where places like Albany care exist and most importantly are accessible to those with Medicaid.
Anyway. Other than a slight cold this week I’m doing well. Happy about thanksgiving tomorrow. Jess and I normally go to IHOP with Jonathan. He takes a group usually new people every year. Jess and I technically first met in the van going there and she cut my waffles. But this year we decided since the food is so bad here even on thanksgiving with the exception of pumpkin pie, that we’d go to old country buffet. I’ve been there before with this really creepy manipulative resident from Friedman who loved the restaurant is quite overweight and I’m sure wanted every excuse to eat. Anyway they’re a good lace.
I’m just hoping it’s not too hot crowded or loud for me. But I’ll take an Ativan beforehand.
So lastly back to my two year anniversary. The staff all say they couldn’t recognize me from when I came in. Edith says she would not have liked working with the “admissions Sam” all teasing of course. She’d do an awesome job I think better than the caseworkers I had at the time did. But yeah. I’m enjoying my life. I know I have staff around when needed. I know food if not great is always available. I met a best friend/ older sister for life, who by the way is doing awesome herself and just got into community college! Considering on November 10 2013 I was truly out of my mind convinced I would be much better off dead, to have found myself and a life again is truly amazing. And I absolutely couldn’t have done it without the persistence of the staff here particularly Jonathan. As he likes to put it he fought my illness along with me to get where I am now. And we’ll continue to fight together, even when we both run the world LOL! And then My jess saved my life. Literally. She burst into my life with nothing but unconditional love. Which was truly painful at first because I never had that and thought I was the last person on earth who could ever give it back to her. Then I started to live for her and the relationship figuring if she loved me so much she’d be heartbroken if I did something to myself, and she’d had a tough life already. I don’t know when I started living for myself.
Now I’m volunteering in my field again and just doing overall well. Knowing this is my home is so reassuring to me, that this is my safe place even with it’s faults that I can keep growing and keep trying to go out into the world but know I have this place of support to come to everyday is exactly what I need. A lot to be thankfull for on the day before thanksgiving!