So the interesting power struggle with Edith continues. Ugh it really wears me out. All I want to do is have a patient creative person sit down and teach me some signs. So when I meet all my cool signing friends we can build off that. And Edith and I were doing that. If she had said in the beginning all this about her taking time out to do it and needing me to do something in return I wouldn’t have done it.
So finally DBT was removed from the equation. There are other half hour groups they have. But they’re really boring often not well run and go over the same information over and over again. We went down the list. We found an anxiety management group for Tuesdays which is fine. She wanted me to do two groups because DBT had been an hour. So we looked and looked could not find anything that either applied to me or was with a leader I could work with. So she’s like let’s do anger management. I’m like what? So she wanted me to do anger management. She said I get angry with crowded elavators lobby doctor’s office ETC. I strongly feel like that’s just total system overwhelm not so much anger. Jonathan even says anger is the least likely emotion that comes up for me usually, and will go into why I was angry when it does happen because he says it’s a big deal or something. Not a bad thing but ya know him.
Every single person I talk to besides her is like no way I can’t see you in anger management! But I was gonna do it today.
But then by the time lunch came around I was wicked weak, how I get if I haven’t eaten much which I didn’t yesterday and the day before I think it caught up with me. So we ordered out and I totally chowed I had a personal pizza half a big cookie and chocolate after my nap. And drank water. Was still weak so decided not to go. Plus like I said really didn’t see the point.
Jess and her big awkward hands said they’d try teaching me again this weekend. You could probably put my hand and half of Robbie’s hand on in one of hers LOL!
But yeah this has to end. Not that any outside people are jumping up and down to help me either. Wrote Columbia university that has a whole signing teacher program figuring someone would be interested in this creative opportunity. They’re like no we can’t. Well thanks for trying. But yeah I’ll figure it out eventually.