Flights are confirmed but still issues with taking PRNS with us

Hey everyone,

Well I almost had a full day of no issues! The flights are confirmed and we have everything for that. My fundraiser money is in my bank account yay!

So things were great. Til Jess came back from seeing her caseworker. Since Monday when Patel said no to PRNS we had our caseworkers talk to her. And Nakia’s said the dr. said flat out no. And the caseworker did not ask why or try to work with her on this. Why are staff literally afraid of higher ups that they won’t get simple answers or really fight for the person their working with?

I mean this whole thing makes zero sense. My ativan is scheduled. So I can have that amount with me every night. But I can’t have some extra for a PRN even though PRNS are in my orders? I’m allowed to have all my scheduled meds they trust us with that but not the other thing.

I’m realizing that maybe one issue is that residents just don’t travel enough to where this comes up. I know that many when they want a break totally just escape to friends and that’s it. Many don’t care at all about meds so will take whatever or nothing at all.

So it could be that this really hasn’t come up if so many people don’t have answers.

So I wrote Anna and Jonathan not sure what writing him would do. She knows how much I need this med. I normally do not take it during the day because things are in a routine here there usually aren’t any really stressful things going on. And if I am anxious I feel safe sitting in the room trying to distract myself crying or sleeping. Out there just being in that house is gonna set off major emotions. Going to the conference which will be lots of fun and I’ll get so much out of it, will also be a huge anxiety because I’ll be trying to connect with others talking about moving back to MA going to the independent living center for it. Just everything that’s good about the trip is also gonna cause anxiety and I’ll be very emotionally vulnerable.

Yes I have other coping skills for anxiety mainly napping, but it’s such a safety for me knowing the ativan is there. And in all the talks I had with Jonathan for months and years about this nowhere did we even think that I wouldn’t be allowed my prns. In fact part of our whole plan for dealing with stuff is I’d take a PRN. If we knew this couldn’t happen we would have had other discussions I guess. But I’m totally unprepared for it. And of course he’s so hard to get ahold of that I’m not bothering asking for a meeting. Just wrote him on it along with anna.

It’s crazy no one will ask for a straight answer. It’s like doctor says no and their word is law. Like seriously?

So yeah we’ll see I’m seeing Anna tomorrow. Told my mom about it maybe she can do something.


Well flight is finally booked and moreJonathan craziness

Hey everyone,

Well today I only cried like a quarter of the day instead of half the day and actually took an ativan so that’s good I guess.

So what happened last night was my mom got on her angry side and left a very nasty message for Jonathan saying that if he didn’t call her she would call the director and if they didn’t help her she’d call the news station in our state!

It was the funniest moment of the day because I don’t think a boston news station can report on something in another state but I’m sure Robbie has that answer.

My dad also textd him something I’m not sure what probably along the same lines.

So hat do ya know he calls them back at like ten at night.

And acts like nothing is wrong/happened! Said that an earlier flight is best, well they had like no choice in the matter anymore because there were only early ones left! And that he’d take us to the airport. Kinda concerned if his record for doing that is like it has been the past week and a half.

So my mom and Krissy were able to look at flights and stuff. And we have a six AM one!

But at least we’re totally booked now. I wasn’t surprised when Mom said she talked to him and he acted like nothing happened. Today I was determined to have him help us with the last of things and let him have it over the past week and a half craziness.

Well before lunch he replied to Jess’s text saying not today for a meeting. I’m like are you kidding! I was all ready to send my mom at him again. But on the way from lunch we ran into him.

He had good intentions but his whole reasoning for not being in touch showed he hadn’t been paying attention to anything anyone has been sending him the last couple weeks. He says oh I wanted to kill two birds with one stone and go take you to the phone store the same time as our meeting. I’m like no. The phone is done it’s not an issue anymore. My mom is gonna take us to the phone store when we get home

This was told to him multiple times right in the beginning of mom nicely starting to get in touch. And clearly saying she would take care of the phone please focus on airport stuff.

Then he said he’d take us to the airport. We will have backup not sure paratransit could take us so early in the morning but we can call I guess. Also a former staff member gave us her contact info if something goes wrong. I told her about Jonathan’s antics lately and she’s not pleased. She askd if we wanted her boss the ombudsman to confront him on it. But he and this woman get along so well I doubt it would do anything.

So anyway I went at him sarcastically asking why he thought we had to have a six AM flight? Before he could say anything I said it’s because you haven’t been in touch with my mom for the last week and a half where we could have gotten the same great airline with reasonable times for flights. That we wouldn’t have to deal with the stress of being up so early along with all the other anxiety. At this point I’m completely angry crying everything. He said that this had nothing to do with my mom not connecting with him over all this time, that the time of day was just better travel wise and getting around the airport and everything. I snapped whatever you can tell yourself that!

And he literally walked away.

So I know where he stands on everything obviously will take no responsibility.

Had a good meeting with Anna, and she was genuine and apologized for not being helpful in the past and she’s still learning. At this point any staff I feel comfortable with here is a bonus. I appreciated her heart felt hug.

So flights are officially booked! Had an emotional conversation with Krissy around sharing a bed with my mom. I was so freaking out about this because it would be the perfect opprtnity for her to say whatever she has to say about Jess and me and my illness, and what’s gonna happen in the future and everything else and I’m stuck in bed with her!

I cried because I just couldn’t hold that in anymore. It was something I planned to discuss with Jonathan the minute I heard about it but obviously that never happened. The support he was going to give my parents leading up to the trip and me obviously is not happening.

So Anna is going to do everything she can. She talked to my mom and my mom liked her. She didn’t know that was my caseworker. At least she’ll do stuff like make sure about the suitcases. Make sure about the PRN stuff which we think between caseworkers and the doctor will be fine. On top of everything I have to explain to nursing and other staff that while here I take one every so often there it will be the most stressful situation of my life! When I explain about how things were at home, our pets dying losing the house they do get it. It’s still up in the air about that we’d get the prns but I’m really hopping.

Those are the last things really. Then just packing doing laundry walmart and haircuts!

It’s so interesting talking to Krissy who does on some level get my issues but doesn’t realize how I need to repeat things in order to process and that not bringing them up makes things worse. It’s an autistic thing! Hopefully the rollercoaster is coming to a stop now.


really bad day: can’t take PRNS with us on visit and Jonathan has still not connected with my parents!

So today was really bad I spent half the day crying.

First of all the lab tech came at like five in the morning and took blood.

Then I went to see Dr. Patel. Well both Jess and I. And she said great about the visit. We both planned to take some PRNS with us, ya know as needed meds. For us it’s ativan and klonopine. I was thinking having one for once a day if needed plus my scheduled dose.

Well apparently that’s not allowed! Some sort of state law for these facilities. They don’t allow you to take them with you because they’re afraid you’ll overdose or otherwise abuse them. We had no idea at all about this. Especially in this type of situation with all the stress I have experienced ever, like seeing my parents after five years the conference and everything. The way I don’t take prns, I probably wouldn’t take them. Or maybe like one. But that doesn’t mean I’d give them away to drug addicts on the streets of boston or take them all at once.

She said to talk to Karen director of nursing. Karen had no idea about this except there is no way she’s gonna break a state law. This whole thing is just so outa hand like we only found out this past week that we’d even have the money. Both for the hotel and the flights. The more days go by between now and when we want to fly the higher the plane tickets are. And Jess needs an extra seat too.

Jonathan did text us back on Friday saying he was working on stuff. Which we think included returning my victor player charger that we thought was my phone charger, and he talked to Anna and Nakia about the trip a little. But he did not get in touch with my parents to talk about making sure we get safely to the airport and on the plane and finding a time where he or someone else could do this. There’s just been absolutely nothing from on that. We write/ text/ call several times a day. He hasn’t seemed to be in much at all this past week. Staff are right when they say they often can’t get ahold of him. If I worked for him and he pulled this disappearing act every so often I’d be very mad. But he can be really intimidating I’ve witnessed him raise his voice it’s not pleasant.

But he knows what a big deal this is! This is like all my therapy has built up to this. Me being able to do this trip. Me wanting to move out with Jess and start a new life it’s what everyone’s been wanting. We have an appointment with the boston center for independent living to talk about resources. More and more people I connect with on facebook want to meet Jess and I. If I don’t see them now I honestly don’t know where my parents will be living very soon and I certainly wouldn’t be able to see the house.

There’s so much at stake. And it’s already so emotional and stressful for me getting each thing done with this. But there is just more and more stuff thrown in my path. I have two psychic friends who I both trust. I don’t know exactly what they tap into but I know that many times it’s been right on target which is scary.

And they’re great people.

They say if you’re on a path and things seem like an uphill fight maybe it’s npot meant to be. Not to say you shouldn’t fight for what you want/ need. But they’re saying that we can will things to happen that The Universe or like our core self or whatever doesn’t want to happen at that moment and then it can blow up in your face.

I’m wondering if they’re right.

Jess is convincing me to not give up til Wednesday at least. I’ll do that. Though it kills me to just not cancel and forget the whole thing. Tomorrow will be the test because that’s our meeting day. Of course that didn’t happen last week. If we can’t find him tomorrow I don’t know what we’re gonna do.

I suppose we could take paratransit but from what I’ve heard from other blind people taking it to the airport is not fun. And we’d be on our own with all these bags and Jess trying to guide me and I can just feel the anxiety!

So yeah we’ll just have to see. Will be sure to keep you posted. I’m just grateful for supportive friends.

I’m sick of these facility rules though. Like who denies someone medicine they need when they’re actually facing more anxiety than their every day stress level?

Part of me can’t wait to move or at least see what’s out there but if we don’t do this trip now I don’t know when the next chance will be. Because the whole point on how this thing started was the conference. We just didn’t pick a random date three weeks away and decide to go for it.

And previously without any pressing incentive like something like the conference we just haven’t been able to get it together to go.

So we’ll see I guess that’s all I can do.


when mental health professionals are so transparent you know the depths of how they’re feeling

Hey everyone,

So had a very interesting experience tonight!

As you all know we’re solidifying our trip!

However it’s been very hard as due to public health and other stuff happening in the facility Jonathan has not been able to see me or be in touch all week. This brings up the usual problem of not having a therapy session, which I’ve gotten used to and am a lot more easy about, but in this case he’s been saying he’s committed to the trip and doing things but he hasn’t done them because he’s so busy! Stuff like texting my mom, confirming airport stuff getting my phone fixed ETC

My PRC/ caseworker Anna obviously knows about the trip. She was one of the people to nudge me back to trying to get going again when I got too overwhelmed. But it takes a lot for me to open up to someone and consider them a professional I trust to process things with. I did try with her on different things. Like with NRS we had huge conversations about what it’s like to be disabled and I knew there was a real barrier around her ability to just sit with that experience with me instead of putting assumptions on it or insisting things aren’t how they really are. And more to the point she’s just not someone who has the skills/ experience to really work with my emotions, to work with someone who’s experienced emotional trauma and needs to be fully accepted around expressing emotions. She’s just not at that level, and I thought that caseworkers weren’t supposed to try and fill that role. That they’re more about basic coping skills, as well as goal setting and doing practical things.

Anyway so we started talking about Jonathan not being around. And me saying I’ve had a lot of anxiety obviously over just everything! So she says maybe we should meet twice a week so you can process your anxiety. I was like no. I don’t want to meet twice a week. I want to either talk to Jonathan, Jess, my online friends or my toys. But I don’t want to do that.

She was extremely caught off guard. Then she’s like well I think it’s important because I don’t want this trip to not happen or there to be big issues. That’s when I really got upset. I was like I don’t understand you. Two weeks ago, when I didn’t even have half the money for this trip you were so optimistic saying I can’t wait to write your vacation pass. Now you’re saying you’re worried if I don’t talk to you about stuff and have you be intensely helping with things that this won’t happen or things will go wrong.

Right when I got upset I could just tell. She got totally silent. She was like in a very emotional voice “Sam I’m sorry. I didn’t know you felt like that. I’m your caseworker I know Jonathan is your therapist but I want to help you with this.”

I was like well I don’t know how you can really help. Beyond sitting in Dr. appointment with me, getting stuff for me, basement stuff in storage, looking things up signing papers ya know caseworker stuff. I was like you can do all that. But the other things you can’t help with.

I had cried a little when getting upset as I always do. If it were Jonathan I would have been able to fully experience and express my feelings of frustration and just wishing she would be there for me, and could be someone I could turn to. Because he’d be able to be in that experience with me and help me manage things. With her I knew the more upset I got literally the more upset she would get.

She was already upset the more I talked the more she was just silent and when she spoke it was with such emotion like she almost was going to cry, or felt deeply hurt or shocked by all this. Overwhelmed, not sure how to respond.

At one point she asked in such a depressed tone like she thought she’d failed “Have I been helpful to you at all as your caseworker?”

I said of course she had been. I was like yeah you have a good grasp on my basic life and who I am. You have helped me nudged me to take this trip, and I would trust you enough to come to you in a crisis if needed say if I wanted to cut or something. I said yeah you helped you’re doing all the right caseworker things you’re just not someone I feel that I can open up to.

She kept askingwhere this was coming from. And I was like well you’re never around so how do you expect me to feel safe processing with you! When you are here you’re incredibly stressed out or just totally thinking of other things/ emotionally overwhelmed. I was gonna put in something about her stimming with the stress ball and pacing but I didn’t. Because I know that would plunge her into more hurt and shame around this.

So that was basically it. She sat there like stunned and I talked out loud to myself. At one point I was like, I think it was when she asked if she were a good caseworker, I was like I know you’re a genuine person. I know this is really hurting you right now and I’m sorry. (sorry that it’s hard for her not sorry for what I said)

She said nothing.

So that’s kinda how we ended things. On another talking to myself tangent I said that she brought up a good point about me needing more than just Jonathan. And maybe I should really consider getting another therapist. Jess’s therapist also works with other residents here, and though often couples/ close people should not see the same therapist. Mr. J is creative and flexible and outside the box so I think it could really really work. It would get me used to trusting another therapist which will be huge when we move. And just like I did say to Anna I’m probably holding in more than I even realize.

I will be seeing my psychiatrist either this Monday or next. And getting her go ahead with the trip. I did say I’m not sure if I should have any med changes due to the anxiety. I said I hoped now that some things have been straighted out and are more in place I may have less anxiety.

So that’s what she’s gonna do. Plus look for the bigger suitcase and get the cord I gave Jonathan for my cell because we think it’s actually my victor player cord. And that’s really all I could give her to do.

She offered to talk to my parents but she has absolutely no relationship with t them or understanding of my family and how huge this is for all of us. Jonathan does.

I’m very surprised with her reaction. First of all as I said, and I know the job description because of helping with HR, I didn’t think PRCS worked therapeutically with people. They’re just learning. As an entry level job I thought the counseling they give is very basic skills training, group or individual and crisis intervention.

However to many residents, who have no idea what the word “process” means, they will likely just open up and talk about anything. And take anything a caseworker says at face value either reacting negatively or ok but they don’t have the relationship awareness that I do. So it does make sense that maybe she expects most residents to just let everything out and so they don’t have that sense on whether she’s the best person for that job.

Secondly residents emotionally and rarely physically, abuse staff. They will say the most horrible things. When I was having my breakdown for months I said horrible things. And at the time it was either say horrible things or cut. So people had to live with it, and Jonathan did a lot of interference and explaining about how to not react to my attempts at expressing emotion. But when I saw they were emotionally affected by my outbursts, this one nursing staff every time I’d cry she’d cry. I would go off on them. I’d be like this is not acceptable you’re the professional!

But anyway all that to say I would think she’s heard worse. I’ve seen her deal with worse. But I think it is different with me because I think she knows I have such awareness of others and are so intelligent and articulate that it felt so personal to her. I think she had a sense of our relationship that’s totally different from mine. I think she felt like I meant more to her as a support person, than I do. Also a very common statement from her that’s always bugged me is that things are so busy around here that seeing me is her break! I’ve joked that’s my cue to go off, but now I think it might seriously be a part of this that she somehow saw me as different from others here, and a person she could just totally not be clinical around and could be herself or something? Like if she’s saying my meeting is a break for her that’s saying something! It’s probably a mix of everything. Plus this week has been a nightmare with public health around a lot of hospitalizations and things.

But it was just one interesting emotional experience. More for her than me! At one point I said I wished I could give her a stuftie. Just tried to make her laugh. It’s funny how I was using therapeutic interventions on her, empathy and all that. Just lol!

So who knows? I hope she bounces back and is ok with her role as I see it, and that I still very much value her as a caseworker. Not that I’d mind if I were switched though there are a couple I would absolutely not work with. And it’s taken awhile for her to understand as much as she does about my complicated life and self.

I love when professionals are transparent and take off the clinical mask. There are a lot of moments when not doing so is harmful and demeans someone’s experience by boxing it in. But this is just as harmful to be flooded with so much emotion in response to a client that the client feels the need to support them!

Will let you know what happens. Will especially talk with Jonathan about the Sandra thing.


Solidifying our trip!

Hey everyone,

Haven’t posted in forever! Been very stressed about no phone and this trip!

Last night was awake til two in the morning really reminded me of my pre ativan/ Benadryl days! My stuffed animals and dolls were not happy to be kept up that long neither was Jess LOL

I literally went online and looked at flight costs at midnight.

But then talked to my mom today and she’s gonna book the flight as long as Jonathan can find a time to get us on the plane safely on that Thursday.

Slight change in plans that’s kinda sad. Since my parents are literally having to leave the house at any minute as they’re selling, we can’t stay til Thursday. My sister put it really nicely and I guess it’s just so stressful for the three of them trying to live there and basically make it not look like they’re living there! And with mom with her back and stuff it must be really hard. But we will be going out on Thursday as planned. Can hang out on Friday til the conference. Can stay Monday night. Will leave mid day Tuesday or early Wednesday.

So at least that’s set which makes me feel better.

Other interesting news. Jess and I have been seriously looking into moving back to MA next year. Like actually putting out info on what we’re looking for. I found these places called housing co-ops people share house responsibilities and rent and stuff. Cuts costs. Many are artests and actavists and over all relaxed friendly people. We think that would work for us. Even with support services coming in if we got help for household stuff we’d still be just us two by ourselves in an apartment and to me that’s overwhelming. Knowing there are others there would make a big difference and I love the idea of sharing resources.

Have been meeting all sorts of wesome people on facebook groups who are open and friendly.

So the other thing I was doing was writing up a little info thingy on what Jess and I are looking for.

So that’s done yay!

We’re thinking if Mr. J absolutely can’t take me to the phone store Mom will help us get it when we’re back in MA. Usually talking to mom stresses me out. But a lot of things especially talking about the house/ staying stuff Krissy handled which was good.

So yeah I’m all excited!


Amazing news! My stay at the hotel for Alternatives is covered! now just airfare and extra cash

Hey everyone,

I have to give a shout out to my Uncle David on my Grammy’s Side. Last night he donated generously $200! Which brings my total up to $704!

I’m absolutely off the wall excited!

It means the hotel is covered! I’m going!

Now we just need the airfare and some extra money. Airfare we’ve estimated based on Jonathan’s looking a few weeks back, to be about $400. We would like about $100 for extra cash, for food and anything else we might need on the trip.

So have been able to lower my goal on the fundraising site to $500 and I’m hopeful about donations.

I believe my grandparents might donate for the airfare but am not sure how much and don’t want to pin everything on that.

I’m absolutely like I have no words! Except OMG I’m really going!

The rollercoaster will continue of course with lots of anxiety.

Below are my links which I’d still love it if you’d share with your friends or anyone you know.

Paypal direct donations are best



Book Review: Who Will Love me Now? by Maggie Hartley

I just finished listening to (yay Maggie is on audio!) Maggie Hartley’s latest foster care memoir Who Will Love me Now?

Maggie and her long term foster daughter Louisa only expect to have Ten year old Kristy as a respite placement. She’s brought to them after witnessing her foster mom have a heart attack that day.

She is meant to only stay with Maggie and their family for a few days. At first Maggie thinks that’s a good thing. Kirsty is hyperactive, constantly chatters, wants her way all the time and throws tantrums like a toddler.

She throws things down the stairs, a tv and other things, slams doors and is very bossy.

She needs constant attention and so does Maggie’s other foster child a ten month old baby. Of course Kristy is very jealous of him for needing Maggie’s attention.

As a week turns into two Maggie learns the truth about this family that agreed to foster Kirsty long term and who she has come to know as her mom and dad, after being neglected by her birth mother.

With nowhere to turn Kirsty’s behavior gets worse. To the point of disrupting the placement of the other child in her home.

Maggie chooses to put all her energy and emotions into working with Kirsty to learn to express her feelings, change her deeply held beliefs about herself and others and generally be able to fit better into a family. Maggie does amazing creative therapeutic work with her, saying she’s done this kind of emotion based work with other kids before. Kirsty’s placement at a therapeutic school, rather than the mainstream school where she was constantly disruptive, does wonders for her self-esteem. She is in an environment where she is nurtured and able to express herself/ get support emotionally but not able to get away with anything around being controlling and bossy or hurting others.

The positive turn Kirsty’s life takes is as shocking as it is just the right fit for both she and the family that reaches out to her. Maggie does an amazing job with this very challenging and deeply wounded little girl. Kirsty leaves Maggie’s house nine months later with a new sense of self, calmer and knowing that she is loved.


Three year anniversary of our double room!

Three years in our double room OMG yay!!

Three years ago today Mr. J had the crazy idea to put two cutters, the first active cutters I think they ever had here or at least in years, in the same room by themselves! It was the best idea he ever had! Well actually his best idea was my harm reduction care plan.

But anyway you have no idea the anxiety of both being in a room with three other people, or the 26 observation room made me and Jess feel. So many episodes happened with us because of noise in the hall, roommates coming and going and just other stuff. Once he figured out we’re the only compatible roommates for each other, that’s when he decided on the room.

It’s been a tough year for Jess. When she’s been in a crisis they’ve taken her out of the room and to the observation room. And I know why they do it because of stupid protocol mostly, but I always worry that she won’t be able to come back here. But she always has. I haven’t scratched since November 2015!

In other good news I have $484 yay!!


Good session with Jonathan about prep for trip

So had a good Jonathan meeting!

He’ll be taking me to get my new phone hopefully in the next few days.

I told him about some of the things I had been thinking about emotionally. Around the trip. So we talked about that. About how hard it will be for my family to see me doing well, in a way, especially my mom because she’ll feel guilty that I couldn’t do well in her care so to speak. Of course she wouldn’t admit to it but instead would unconsciously make snappy comments to try and get in my way. Which describes her perfectly. I kept saying how intense my mom is and how she reads into any little detail of facial expression, tearing up everything and will go at that and say you’re being too emotional or argumentative or whatever.

He said there’s a lot that will hit me walking in the door. Two out of the three pets gone, house packed up just all sorts of memories and feelings.

He said to try to approach anything I’m feeling by just telling my parents how I’m feeling instead of bursting out with why did you do this or that like I hated you packed up my stuff! Just say it makes me mad or whatever. With my mom’s intensity around people expressing emotions, even if you say it nicely she’s still not ok with it this might not work and still might be too much for her but it’s worth a shot.

He basically said that he would be trying to prepare my mom too like asking her what her questions or fears are and him saying his thoughts on working with me. She really does trust him after all the stuff he’s done for me and how clearly I’ve done so well with him. Another thing about my mom is she has a huge need to appear to be like the best mom ever. So in front of Jess and perhaps knowing Jonathan is “watching” she’ll hopefully have her mask on and not be her totally volatile self. Jonathan said we would want someone looking in to roll their eyes and say they don’t know why I have a problem with my mom!

Hoping all these factors will help. I know it will be an ongoing process of continuing to talk about feelings as feelings come up. We talked about scratching and he reminded me that it’s not about the scratching it’s about what’s behind it. And at times he respects it as a coping mechanism. If I feel like I can’t do anything but scratch when emotional at my house, that’s fine. So I feel a bit better about that.

Now just hope I can get the money to get to actually go!

Haven’t got any donations since Sunday.


To prospective donors

To prospective Donors

I am writing to encourage you to donate to a fundraising project I have created. I am a totally blind and mentally ill young adult who has a BS in counseling psychology. I am extremely passionate about the areas of advocacy, personal growth, and access to peer support in mental healthcare from a holistic and creativity arts perspective. I am currently living in a situation where all of my income goes to my residence. Due to this I can not afford to attend the alternatives 2017 conference run by the National empowerment center.

They graciously have waived the fees for those who register as volunteers so I will not be charged for the conference itself. I will have to gather the funds to pay for hotel and airfare. The total cost of which is around a thousand dollars. The hotel is $646, and plane fare around $500. I currently have raised $475 in the past few weeks so am 200 short of the goal for the hotel costs.

Should I attend this conference I will greatly expand my knowledge around peer support in mental healthcare on a personal and professional level. The workshops include such topics as intentional peer support, aproaches to creating wellness tools, holistic care in inpatient settings, conflict resolution, peer respites,trauma informed group healing, youth peer leadership, intentional peer support and more. There will also be many chances to network with other participants and make friends and perhaps future connections for employment/ colaboration will grow from that.

It’s unfortunate that I’m in a situation where I do not have access to any of my personal finances. I’m hoping this conference will personally help me gain confidence and practical support from others to perhaps leave my current living situation and therefore have more financial and personal independence.

Please consider donating whatever you feel comfortable with. I have a goal of a thousand dollars to cover hotel costs, cost of transportation and other little expenses. I am currently at $475 which is about 200 dollars away from the hotel fee for the conference! If I could raise that money in the next week it would really increase my chances of being able to know for sure that I can attend.

Thank you. My paypal is below

Youcaring page (due to paypal donations does not reflect full amount received!)